>>125508
bro it only took me a month but I just finished reading chapter 2. For being a writer or whatever, I fluffing hate reading, probs because I did my life's share of that shit as a whelp. There were a handful of grammatical errors, but it's good overall. It's been a while since I read the first two sections (and I accidentally read earlier draft versions of them instead), so I'm likely forgetting some stuff, but I do have some questions like how in the world everyone so happens to speak the same language. I am enjoying the grotesque character designs and worldbuilding.
The one thing I'd add, really, is just illustrations of the different species and maybe even major characters. That is: I'd embed them in the text itself, or as an attachment or collection somewhere. I say this because, at least early on in those drafts I mentioned, some species names just get namedropped without further description and I'm left scratching my head. Maybe a glossary too for certain terms like "parcel". Though that's not nearly as essential. It's pretty easy to infer those. Especially since the worldbuilding is so alien and it's sci-fi, I think these could work. Think like "species profiles" embedded somewhere in the text.
Maybe that's addressed in the revisions or others have already pointed it out before me, in which case: sorry. gek.
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